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January 31, 2006

The Great Zuchinni

Over at The Volokh Conspiracy, Jim Lindgren points out a fantasic piece of journalism. The subject of the story is an odd man, full of troubles and contradictions, who just happens to be the highest-paid children's party entertainer in the Washington DC area. His name is The Great Zuchinni.

"In the two months I'd gotten to know him, I'd seen several slightly awkward encounters between Eric and a parent, but not one such moment between Eric and a child. It's tempting to imagine him as Holden Caulfield imagined himself, protector of children's souls, poised beside the field of rye at the edge of a cliff, catching them before they plummet to their spiritual deaths. But this man with the guardian angel on his shoulder; who forfeits love for gambling but looks to find it in a strip club; who can't tie a tie or remember to pay a bill; who makes a tidy living but doesn't know where the money goes; who can't recall things that deliver him emotional pain; who solemnly prays to God in the bathroom before every performance for the strength and wisdom to make the 4-year-olds giggle -- this guy has not yet surrendered himself, as Holden reluctantly did, to adulthood. He may never. Maybe it's that he's seen the alternative, and wants no part of it."

Take the time to read this. It's nice to find such well-written work about a truly interesting individual, involved in a world that, to me, seems so alien yet familiar.

Posted by Lockjaw at 10:07 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 23, 2006

Coming out of Busy-ness

It's been a busy week and a half around the lair. It has seemed like every day has been stuffed full of something important to do, or recovery from it. I love the busy weeks, when they come, but I'm sure glad when they come to an end, and I can go back to normality.

Last weekend was the start. At work, a short term contract position opened up for someone interested. I got the spot. As a result, I was able to take part in a major software migration project for a television station located approximately an hour and a half from home. This meant working all weekend, with long days, and three hours of commute per day. The job involved removing Novell clients from the computers, installing Outlook, setting up accounts, and testing. Saturday was spent walking from computer to computer, which was a nice change of pace from my daily work. We were expected to complete 60% of that particular migration that day, and we completed 100% of them. That was nice. Sunday, we spend the first part of our day setting up Outlook web clients. Since each test process required sending 3 test emails, which had to be typed in separately (only one small opportunity for non-unique pasting of text) we had to hand-type almost everything for the tests. Over the course of four hours, I estimate that I sent between 250 and 350 emails.

Monday, the wife and I spent the day shopping and cooking. We visited three different stores, one of which was a half-hour drive. We picked up a lot of food, ranging from bulk-bin rices to fresh fruits and vegetables to pasta and sauce-makings. This was an hours-long process. Immediately following, we began what turned out to be just over 5 hours of cooking. The result? We have 18 family-size pasta dishes prepared and frozen, for use as quick-cooking, no-prep-time dinners. We have enough bag salad for two weeks, and enough makings for more than a week and a half of chicken and something meals. For the next month, we've handled virtually all of our dinner needs and many of our lunches and breakfasts. This cuts the evening food-prep time from 30 minutes or an hour of prep and cooking to, usually, a quick pop in the microwave and a wait. This results in more productive time for ourselves in the evening. That's good.

Tuesday had me back at the TV station, doing desk-to-desk checks on the users and their new configurations. Any problems had to be dealt with, and many users needed training on their new applications. This was the easiest, and most fun part of the project.

Wednesday started out nice and relaxing, as it was my "day off." In the afternoon, however, projects took over, followed by church and the youth group's worship service.

Thursday, it was back to my regular work at the job. Since the contract at the TV station had been handled through my employer, I wasn't worried about the time off. I didn't really have any. Getting back in the regular groove was easy enough, and I was glad to be back to normality. After work, though, I had enough time for a quick dinner (luckily, we have those now) and then it was off to a training session. I took part in the first class of a series to qualify in the National Incident Management System (NIMS). This lasted until after 9pm, and then I was home in bed soon after.

Friday, another normal day at work. Anyone who knows me, though, knows that Fridays are an important night at the Ogre's Lair. Friday is when Stargate SG-1, it's lesser cousin Stargate Atlantis, and the best show on TV: Battlestar Galactica come on. The wife prepared dinner, consisting of marinated, baked chicken with brown rice, steamed vegetables, and roasted, marinated brussels sprouts. We then settled in to watch our block of Sci-Fi. Unfortunately, before SG-1 had finished, we had both fallen asleep, missing the entire evening of TV.

Approximately 10.5 hours later, we woke up to start our Saturday. Though much more relaxed, Saturday was also spent doing a bit of food shopping. This time, it was staples and snacks. The bulk-bins at Whole Foods provided the daily snack-bag of nuts and dried fruit I like as a mid-morning protein break. Food Lion was the source for Breyers Fruit-on-the-Bottom yogurts (on sale). World Market has the flatbread/crackers we have discovered for our hummus, cheese, or spread snacks. They also have their own brand of chocolate/hazelnut spread similar to Nutella (yum) and we discovered a delicious dark chocolate bar flavored with strawberries and pepper that is out of this world.

While at Whole Foods, I asked the cheesemonger what he thought would be "the best snack-on-crackers cheese I've never tried." He suggested a Pirrano cheese, which is from the Gouda family. This is a great strategy for you to use in discovering new cheeses, and since I'm trying to discover new cheeses, I'm glad I tried it.

Saturday evening, we finally watched the new Battlestar Galactica. This show just keeps getting better and better. If you haven't watched it, you're really missing out. Grab the Season 1 DVD set and start watching.

Sunday, it was Church, followed by lunch with my parents (as usual.) After, the wife and I went home and watched a mini-marathon of the first 5 episodes of Lost, which we'd never seen. We look forward to the next mini-marathon, coming soon (perhaps this coming weekend.)

Now, the rush is over. Work is normality. No more rush for a while. Of course, there's always the conversational Spanish class which starts tonight...

Posted by Lockjaw at 1:08 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 19, 2006

Kelo -vs- Church in Oklahoma

In the original SimCity game, this type of post-Kelo action would be trouble. Every hardcore SimCity player knew that bulldozing a church to redevelop the land it sat on would result in an earthquake. Now, in Oklahoma, a political earthquake may be coming. The Anchoress tells a story of how churches, homes, and businesses are going to be bulldozed to make room for a new "Super Center" of stores, including a Home Depot.

The Kelo decision of the US Supreme Court wasn't where this started. It was around before. The Supremes just turned the gravel road of tax-based seizures into a superhighway. Let's home someone cleans this mess up in my lifetime.

Posted by Lockjaw at 9:25 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 12, 2006

Reality Follows the Dave Chappelle Show

Meet Ron Stallworth, the black klansman.

"About 25 years ago, Ron Stallworth was asked to lead the Ku Klux Klan chapter in Colorado Springs. Brian Nicholson, Deseret Morning NewsRon Stallworth carries his KKK membership card as a memento. Problem was, the outgoing Klan leader didn't know that Stallworth is black."

Note that this is not this black klansman, or this black klansman or this potential black klansman.

Posted by Lockjaw at 10:55 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

January 10, 2006

Is the Lottery Illegal?

Now that the North Carolina Legislature has passed the ill-advised lottery bill, and we're well on the way to having what appears to be the most wasteful and corrupt lottery in the land, storms are appearing on the horizon. The biggest storm, right now, is a lawsuit against the legislature charging that the lottery was illegally passed. Senator Eddie Goodall of Union County has written an op-ed detailing the basic problem with the Lottery's passing. The problem is constitutional in nature, so I'll quote not only from the op-ed, but also from the North Carolina Constitution.

"After the first reading of the lottery act when it was introduced, the House passed its version of the lottery on April 6 with a 61-59 vote on second reading and a voice vote on third reading. The Senate passed its version of the lottery Aug. 30 when the lieutenant governor broke a 24-24 tie to give the bill a one-vote majority."

That, from the op-ed. Now, the North Carolina Constitution:

"No laws shall be enacted to raise money on the credit of the State, or to pledge the faith of the State directly or indirectly for the payment of any debt, or to impose any tax upon the people of the State, or to allow the counties, cities, or towns to do so, unless the bill for the purpose shall have been read three several times in each house of the General Assembly and passed three several readings, which readings shall have been on three different days, and shall have been agreed to by each house respectively, and unless the yeas and nays on the second and third readings of the bill shall have been entered on the journal."

Since the third reading in the House with a voice vote, the "yeas and nays" were not "entered on the journal" on that vote. This is NOT in keeping with the proper procedures of the NC Constitution. Any bill passed in any method that is not in keeping with proper procedures of the NC Constitution is invalid and illegal. Thus, the lottery is not valid law, and any advancement of it should be halted immediately.

Either our Constitution is the strict law by which all government activities and laws in this state must be governed, or it is nothing at all. The whole reason we have a constitution is to define how our government is to operate, and what limitations are placed on it. If the current Legislature means to ignore our Constitution, then it should be removed. Considering how much it has ignored our Constitution in the recent past, especially regarding election law, I think we're nearing a time when we should consider calling in the US Department of Justice or the federal court system to enforce the law.

Harsh?

No.

Posted by Lockjaw at 11:48 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 9, 2006

Lose the Beer Belly

It was one of those funny commercial shows. You know the ones. The network decides to make an easy buck by making a whole hour-long show that is nothing but funny commercials. One commercial stuck in the minds of my wife and I for a few years, now, and I just located the video. Thanks, Google Video.

Posted by Lockjaw at 9:08 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 5, 2006

Open Letter to "Old Europe" from VodkaPundit

If I had to make a top-ten list of blogs, VodkaPundit would probably be running for a spot. I'm grooving on his Open Letter to Old Europe.

Posted by Lockjaw at 8:40 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Blonde Joke

It's been a while since I've heard a blonde joke this good.

Posted by Lockjaw at 8:10 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 3, 2006

Letters Home from Terrorist Youth Camp

Want a laugh? Read these letters home from kids at Terrorist Camp.

Posted by Lockjaw at 10:43 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack